Is There Life After Life?

Readers, please enjoy this guest blog post by Dr. Kenneth J. Doka, author of the new When We Die.

A number of years ago, a good friend died the day before his son’s (my godson’s) fourth birthday. As he lay dying, he asked me to promise to look out for his son. It was a promise I readily kept; as he grew, we helped him with school projects and clothes. We sent him to sports camps and brought him along on family vacations.

On one vacation in the Bahamas, my godson was having the time of his life—snorkeling, swimming, and jet skiing. One night, as I walked on the beach alone, I had an incredible experience. I can only describe it by saying that it felt like every cell in my body was being individually hugged. While it was amazingly joyful, there was a sense of sadness to it, as I felt my friend was both thanking me for fulfilling my promise, and now assured that the promise would be kept, was saying goodbye. I had experienced his presence before—though never that strongly. After that night, I would never experience it again.

Over a near half-century in the field, I have heard many such stories about the extraordinary experiences that surround death. Some take place after a death. We may feel a sense of the deceased’s presence—as I did. In other cases, it might be an actual sense experience where we see, feel, touch, or even smell the presence of someone who died. Still others may have an experience that is more symbolic—for example, one person shared with me her experience after the death of her sister. Her sister told her at the time of her death, she should look for a butterfly. After the funeral, she opened her window and a monarch butterfly flew right in and out again. In other cases we may dream of the person who died.

Such experiences are relatively common—nearly two-thirds of bereaved individuals share such experiences, and most find them very comforting.

Other extraordinary experiences may occur right before death. For example, Maggie Callanan and Patricia Kelley, two nurses, found that many dying patients obliquely communicate the nearness of death by recounting visits with deceased relatives, talking of an impending trip (often when they cannot even get out of bed), or simply noting that death is near. They call this nearing death awareness a “final gift” in that it allows family and friends the opportunities to say goodbye, share cherished memories, and finish any unresolved business.

In my new book, When We Die: Extraordinary Experiences at Life’s End, I explore the range of experiences that individuals might have as they encounter death. Some of these, such as near death experiences, are well-known and documented. Others, such as ghosts and apparitions, premonitions of death, strange coincidences around death, or reincarnations, are the stuff of stories, legends—well portrayed in the media. Yet other reactions—such as terminal lucidity where someone in a coma, a person with dementia, or an individual with life-long intellectual disabilities suddenly regains consciousness and seems fully aware prior to death—are less well-known.

These types of end-of-life experiences have been reported throughout history and across cultures. And even if they do not fall easily within our science, our philosophies, or our beliefs, they offer hope that there is something beyond the grave.

Our thanks to Kenneth for his guest post! For more from Dr. Kenneth J. Doka, read his article, “What Happens When We Die? 4 Types of Extraordinary Experiences at the End of Life.”