Preparing the Soil for Growing a Magical Life

If you want a beautiful garden, you can't just toss some seeds onto the dirt and walk away. A few ratty blooms might reach up past the insects and weeds, but that lush, colorful little patch of nature you imagine probably won't materialize. You must first prepare the soil and mindfully plan your garden so your plants can sprout and thrive.

It's the same with creating a magical life. You must prepare your magical "soil"—body, mind, and spirit—so your magical practices can take root, grow, thrive, and blossom into the sparkling magical life you desire.

Maybe you want to learn to read tarot or develop an herbal healing practice or dig into Pagan history and culture. Maybe you want connection to the earth or deity. Maybe you simply want to thread wonder, serenity, and deeper meaning throughout your life. Maybe one, some, or all. Maybe you don't even know what you want just yet, you just know you want something. Whatever your goal is, it's the right one, because you are the creator of your magical life, perspectives, and practices.

Unlike a real garden, preparing your magical soil won't leave you with dirty, calloused hands or aching knees. And, it won't even cost anything. Whether you're just beginning your search for your own magical, spiritual path, or you're already on your way but your "garden" is looking mighty sad and choked with weeds, just like in a real garden, we begin with the soil.

Let's dig in!

Pull the Weeds
Before we can plant a garden space, we must pull the weeds, which drain nutrients and water from your plants, and hog up space. What drains the "nutrients" from your life—your energy, time, and peace? Which people, things, or activities take up more space than they deserve? Not sure? Here's a clue: After spending time with that person or doing that activity, you feel exhausted, resentful, and unwell, rather than refreshed and rejuvenated. Toxic people and situations leave you feeling energetically disturbed and depleted. Nurturing people and situations do just the opposite.

A magical life is all about energy—your awareness of it, and access to it, and how you choose to move it around to create positive change in your life; to thoroughly enjoy the moments of your life. When your energy is diverted to toxic people and situations, your magical focus and practice suffers, because your energy isn't limitless. It's finite, just like your little garden space. Everything won't fit, and you need space to grow what you want.

A basic witchcraft tenet is "harm none," and "none" includes yourself. If a relationship, activity, or situation causes you stress and frustration, and continually diverts your time and energy, it's harming you. Choosing to continue participating in that toxic dance means you're choosing to harm yourself. Let's make a better choice. First, let's identify those stressors.

Detecting toxic people in our lives isn't as simple as it might seem. It's not about whether or not we like that person. We can love a person dearly and (not "but") the relationship can still be toxic. These people can behave like energy vampires, sometimes without realizing it. They aren't bad, necessarily—just insatiably needy. They crave your attention. However, that doesn't obligate you to provide it. You don't have to stop loving them or spending time with them, but you can take control over the interactions. You can set boundaries, and make use of the magical word, "No."

Decide upon your boundaries with a chronically troublesome friend/relative/neighbor/co-worker, and commit to them. For example, your phone rings and it's that energetic vortex. You don't want to get sucked into an hour's worth of complaining, gossiping, bitching, and negativity. Before answering, set your boundary and state it to them:
"I only have 10 minutes to chat and then I need to go."
"Please email this to me, so I can more carefully consider your concerns."
"If you yell or swear at me, the conversation's over."

If pulling the weeds entirely is impossible, constrict the area they're allowed to occupy. Ask for texts instead of phone calls, and let calls go to voicemail. Schedule appointments, like a lunch date, which has a finite beginning and ending, rather than open-ended visits that may drag on for hours. Above all, you must learn to say "No," and mean it. "No" is one of the most powerful magical tools you have. It's a complete answer, and requires no further explanation or justification. "I said 'no'," on repeat, teaches others that your "no" means "no." Hard stop.

You can set boundaries and say "no" to activities, too. Pull the weeds of empty obligations and unnecessary stressors that take up space and drain your energy. Ask yourself: Will this activity or group cease to function without my participation, resulting in calamity and suffering for others? Unless the answer's "yes" (and it's probably not because we aren't as indispensable as we like to believe), if it doesn't bring joy or satisfaction to your life, or benefit people or causes you deeply care about, ditch it.

Besides people and situations, there may be something else siphoning magical energy away: Clutter. Clutter isn't your precious things or special collections. It's stuff that gathers and piles up, in the home or yard, that you don't use or don't even like, and piles of clutter are where energy goes to die.

In Feng Shui, the flowing life force energy is called "chi," and the art of Feng Shui is arranging your home so that chi may flow freely. Clutter is the arterial plaque of chi. It inhibits the flow, and eventually chokes it out. At its core, magic is energy, and the mindful movement of it. Clutter constantly tugs at the back of your mind, whining, "Clean me" and "Dust me" and "Organize me," gnawing at your magical energetic flow like mice in the pantry.

Go through your home and yard, bit by bit, area by area, item by item, and identify what needs to be cleaned, dusted, organized, or discarded. Identify things that have bad memories or unpleasant feelings attached to them, like guilt, grief, loss, or obligation. If you pick it up, and immediately have a negative gut reaction, get rid of it. Give it away, toss it in the trash, take it to the thrift store. Weed it out. Being surrounded by things that trigger sad, painful, or resentful feelings is detrimental to magical growth.

As you begin liberating yourself from toxic people, situations, obligations, and clutter, you'll discover that your emotional, physical, and spiritual space feels free, open, and able to receive whatever magical practices and enhancements you wish. Now, there's room to grow!

Prepare the Soil
With the pesky weeds gone, now we need to focus upon the health of the soil itself. We need to rake it free of rocks, clods, roots, and debris that inhibit the magical growth. Your soil needs to be clear, free, smooth, and supple.

For our magical purposes, your body and brain are your soil. Consider the quality of existing within your body. Do you feel chronically exhausted, bloated, stiff, or achy? Your body will divert your energy to attending to those things, and once again, your magical growth is stuck with the leftover energy, which stunts your magical evolution.

Do you feel like you're locked in perpetual battle with your body, always wishing it would be a certain size or shape, or that various weaknesses or issues would disappear? Do you look at your naked self in the mirror and groan? For our magical soil to be fertile, we need to pinch this hurtful self-talk out. Say "No!" to those thoughts. Replace them with a positive affirmation, or simply an expression for your body doing what it does. Let's take a cue from nature. The trees and animals don't fret over whether they'll look good in tight jeans. They just are. Existence is their joy.

Reframe your beliefs about your body: It's not a pretty plaything for others to enjoy. It carries you through this one and only life, and allows you to enjoy all of life's pleasures and experiences. When your body feels chronically unwell, those pleasures and experiences suffer, and so does your magical practice. When your self-esteem regarding your body is chronically negative, it degrades your magical experience. You must believe that you deserve all that life has to offer, and if you're full of self-loathing for your body, you aren't going to truly believe you deserve all you desire.

For the sake of ink space, I'm hopping over the staples—eat healthy, stretch, and move more—and focusing upon the biggie: sleep. Good sleep is your magical power generator. If you're dragging your exhausted little self through the day by gulping coffee and power drinks, ignoring your brain's cries for rest, it's like trying to drive with one foot on the accelerator and the other on the brake. You might manage to move forward, but with great difficulty and lackluster progress. Get enough sleep, and you'll glide forward.

A chronically exhausted brain won't magic. It'll prioritize survival over everything else, and survival requires sleep. Quality sleep. If you're already sleeping long enough but are exhausted anyway, find out if you have an underlying health issue that needs attention. In particular, find out if you have sleep apnea. Sleep apnea isn't a joke. It can kill you, and your magic, too.

Create a bedtime ritual that cues your brain and body that it's time to rest. Do an experiment. For one month, aim for 8 hours of good sleep each night. If you've been trundling through life shackled by chronic sleep deprivation, compare how your brain and body feel after a month of getting regular, restorative rest. Your bright, clear mind, and well-rested body will be ready to fully embrace all the magical practices you wish to incorporate into your life, and really appreciate them.

Planning for Planting
At last, we're ready to plant this magical garden. But what? There's only so much space, just like in a real garden. You must be mindful and selective about what you'll plant. In magic, visualization is key. Visualize your "garden" when it's mature. What magical energy do you want in your life? Do you want to freewheel it as a solitary witch or join a group and benefit from the wisdom and connection with others? Do you want to follow a certain path? Do you want plenty of magical structure and discipline, or do you want to follow your heart and intuition?

Decide what you really want, and don't hold back! In a magical life, you don't just want the whole enchilada—you want all the enchiladas!

Here are some suggestions for helping you to define your magical goals:

• Study. Research. Explore. Read actual books! There's a cornucopia of magical wisdom thoughtfully written by people with vetted expertise and experience, and it's all at your fingertips. Be a magical cherry-picker. Be curious. Be bold. Sample lots of things at the magical buffet so you'll know what you really love, and what you never want to taste again.
• Be exceedingly wary with social media. There's a lot of fascinating information and ideas, but there's also a lot of crap. Having a million followers isn't equivalent to experience, expertise, and magical wisdom. Just because someone posts something doesn't mean it's helpful or valid. Be wise and discerning about who you follow, and who you scroll past.
• Always trust your own intuition first. It's the strongest magical skill you have. It will guide you down your own magical path, and enhance your ability to distinguish what information is helpful to you, and what is not.

Some Magical Basics
As you're visualizing your magical life garden, here are some simple yet meaningful things you can do while you're exploring, learning, and growing. They should blend nicely into whatever path you ultimately choose or create.

• Attune to the Moon. The moon's waxing and waning energies are basic to Pagan practices, magic, and witchcraft. Each phase of the moon has a different energy—attracting, repelling, and pausing—and each sets an energetic tone for magical endeavors, practices, and rituals. The current moon phase is on most weather apps, and there are paper calendars showing the moon's phase each day. In the beginning, you don't have to do anything with the moon's energy. Just become aware of each phase, and how that feels. Experiment with aligning your choices with the energy of that phase.
• Connect to the Elements. The four earthly elements—Earth, Air, Fire, Water—are each associated with particular energies. Earth is tangible: health, wealth, and stuff. Air is the intellect, the mind, and learning. Fire is passion, courage, and transformation. Water is emotion, creativity, and compassion. When you need something, invite the corresponding energy of one, some, or all of the elements to facilitate it.
• Create an Altar. An altar can be an elaborate magical masterpiece, or simply a candle and a shell. Choose a spot in your home that feels magically attractive—a shelf, small table, or windowsill. Magically cleanse it with some herbal smoke. Plain old bay leaves from your spice cabinet work just fine. As you wave the smoke over the space, speak an affirmation, such as, "May I be peaceful and at one with Mother Earth." Adorn your altar with things that support that affirmation with magical energy. Forget about which crystal or herb means what. For now, let your intuition choose your magical supports.
• Dedicate magical time to each day. Maybe a moment of meditation or quiet reflection, a stroll in a natural setting, or reading a few pages in a book on magic or witchcraft. Commit to that magical moment every day.
• Honor your own pace. A magical life isn't a contest. It's not a goal, it's an ongoing process; a never-ending journey of discovery. There's no Certificate of Achievement or degree to earn. There's no "getting there" in magic. There's only presence with that energy, here and now. If you want to go slowly and examine every magical detail along the way, fine. If you want to zoom forward and devour every magical morsel of information you can find, fine. There's no right way. Only your way.

Keep it Growing
A garden isn't a painting. It's never finished. It changes and grows, and as it does, some things may need transplanting, or you may want to add something new, or take something away. You must tend that garden, keep the weeds and critters at bay, and provide all the light, water, and nutrients it needs. Don't just keep it alive. Help it thrive.

Your magical life is the same. As you explore, you may discover new trails to go down, new ideas to consider, and new practices to try. Keep going, keep it growing, and see what beautiful things may blossom.